Two weekends within 12 days till departure. I’ve never had to prepare for anything like this trip. If it was just me going I’d still be freaking out. I have to pack LOADS of crap for Bear, and currently he’s being counted as an infant which has a restricted amount of luggage we can bring. For checked luggage I can bring up to two suitcases under 70 lbs (70 pounds?!?! What the hell would anyone do with 70 pounds of crap???). For cabin luggage I can bring up to two bags, also a stroller and a car seat. Let’s think about this logically: how am I going to get through an airport to the gate with Connor Joe, a car seat, a stroller, and two large carry-ons?? In the good ole days my brother could walk me to the gate but not anymore…. Thanks A LOT you stupid terrorists. Still on the list to get:
Benadryl
Ear plugs for the other passengers
A new toy or two to occupy the wee one
Various Target items
I keep thinking how much easier this would be with another person…. If Sean was coming as we planned months ago. As much as I know I don’t want to be with him, I do. It’s very telling that I’m making this trip alone; his family sees that I’m not all talk and that I’m different from Sean. The possibilities that this trip holds are incredible and still a part of me is grieving the loss of the old Sean in our lives. But my chin is up; I know that I won’t get to where I want to go without the pain of letting go of where I was. This trip holds so many purposes, the silent and possibly most important one being of rejuvenation. Though Connor is getting christened, his Mom will be reborn.
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